Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:19 pm Post subject: Businesses Don't Have Emotions?
An auto shop client is having a bad morning. When called, he questions the price, in a less than friendly manner. That afternoon things have settled down. The client’s mood has changed and he returns to pay for the service. Instead of friendly service he receives the “cold shoulder.” The client has long forgotten the morning exchange. The evening’s treatment remains in his mind and he never returns.
Business people are first and foremost, people. They may see the situation totally different. Since they were treated in a less than civil manner, they feel justified to respond in like manner.
Clients tend to see a business as just that, an entity without emotion. Receiving an emotional response is inconsistent with their expectations.
The shop might feel justified but the ramifications are predictable. The client does not return, future revenue is loss, referrals are loss and other potential clients may be steered away. Clients are not dependent on a given business for service; business is dependent on clients for survival.
Knowing this might help, but emotion is a very powerful thing. Some are blessed with a personality that allows a non-emotional response in almost any situation. I am much better than I used to be, but still have to struggle. What things help you to keep your emotions in check, in a business situation?
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 146 Location: Garden City, KS
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:27 pm Post subject:
I think first and foremost, I try very hard to see things from the clients point of view. If I can sympathize with them, then I feel I can connect with them better. It is hard. Great post, Louis. Later, Matt.
Joined: 17 Aug 2007 Posts: 3 Location: Amherst, Massachusetts
Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2007 8:20 pm Post subject:
I don't know how good this idea is, for an established company.
It does not make me feel good to be abused by clients. Therefore, if clients act in a nasty manner, I'd rather they not return. Now, I recognize that I lose future revenue by acting that way, but I reduce my stress level, too.
There was a time when the customer was always right, and I'd tolerate most anything with a smile. That time, for me, has passed. I guess when you reach the point where you no longer have to report to work you see things differently. If it's not enjoyable, ebing there, I don't want to do it.
I have considered the two ways to deal with that at my shop: My way, or hiring someone to be nice and even tempered. I don't know the answer, though.
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 7:59 pm Post subject:
Hi Bud,
Bud wrote:
Active listening skills, but they get rusty if not practiced daily.
Great suggestion, and very tough to do. I have certainly over reacted because I did not hear what the person intended. Worse I heard what was not intended. I think the majority of arguments I have ever had might have been avoided with better listening skills. Thanks Bud, I appreciate your suggestion.
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 8:08 pm Post subject:
Hi Matt,
MattFMN wrote:
I think first and foremost, I try very hard to see things from the clients point of view. If I can sympathize with them, then I feel I can connect with them better. It is hard. Great post, Louis. Later, Matt.
I have caught myself not doing this, only to regret my reaction, once the whole story was learned. Recently I had an elderly gentlemen come in. First he asked for an alignment. When I asked what the vehicle was doing, he said it had a vibration. I suggested we should check the vibration.
He got a bit indignant and said no, he wanted an alignment, the vehicle was pulling to the right. Okay, but would you like to also have me check the vibration? What vibration, I want an alignment!
I swallowed hard and said yes sir. We aligned the vehicle and when he came to pick it up, he was totally different. He had recently suffered a stroke and was not himself all of the time. He thanked me for being understanding.
Thanks Matt, that's great advise, I appreciate the input.
Joined: 17 Aug 2007 Posts: 3 Location: Amherst, Massachusetts
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 8:16 pm Post subject:
Louis, I think your last post, the story of the fellow with the stroke, suggest that we would all benefit from greater tolerance and understanding in our dealings with others.
My book actually contains a strong message of tolerance, too, based upon my experience with autism.
That said, I am not convinced that we should suffer abuse at the hands of nasty customers just to win business. The fellow with a stroke is one case. The kid with an attitude that comes in tanked up and looking for an argument is entirely another.
We all have to decide how much to tolerate in a given situation, and for me, if there's no liklihood of feeling good about the transaction after, why do it?
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 8:42 pm Post subject:
Hi John,
johnrobison wrote:
I don't know how good this idea is, for an established company.
It does not make me feel good to be abused by clients. Therefore, if clients act in a nasty manner, I'd rather they not return. Now, I recognize that I lose future revenue by acting that way, but I reduce my stress level, too.
There was a time when the customer was always right, and I'd tolerate most anything with a smile. That time, for me, has passed. I guess when you reach the point where you no longer have to report to work you see things differently. If it's not enjoyable, ebing there, I don't want to do it.
I have considered the two ways to deal with that at my shop: My way, or hiring someone to be nice and even tempered. I don't know the answer, though.
I think the meaning of the word "abusive" might be a key. I had a friend that started his business about the same time I did. For many years he enjoyed it and had a good business. At some point something changed for him. At around that same point in time he started telling me about the problems he was having with clients.
Towards the end he was "firing" about two a week. His thought was the public had changed, they are no longer the people he enjoyed working with?
Certainly there have been many people over the years that I could not do business with. Once a man wanted me to falsify an insurance claim. I told him I would not do that and he became angry. As he left he said, "I'll never be back!"
I saw no reason to apologize for my action, yet I saw no reason to make the matter personal. I replied I'm sorry to hear that and let it drop. A week later he did return, apologized and I repaired the vehicle as I suggested. He has since been in several times and always been very personable. We have never mentioned the previous exchange.
I have also handled people in an emotional manner. Given the choice I would wish to handle them all like I did the former. That has not always been the case. As I get older I find it easier to control my emotions. When I look back, I realize I have done and said many things that have not been appropriate. Some have been forgiven, some not. Thanks John, I truly appreciate your input.
Joined: 17 Aug 2007 Posts: 3 Location: Amherst, Massachusetts
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 8:59 pm Post subject:
Louis, I have always thought you are an insightful, thoughtful, and spiritual fellow. I think we sometimes have to separate what's good for US from what's good for OUR COMPANIES and recognize that they will not always be the same.
Those of us who are employees must try and keep the interests of the company first if we are to keep our jobs. Those of us who are owners have more flexibility.
You know, I don't fire many customers, myself. But I do decline more work, when I don't feel the outcome will make me feel good.
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 9:07 pm Post subject:
johnrobison wrote:
Louis, I think your last post, the story of the fellow with the stroke, suggest that we would all benefit from greater tolerance and understanding in our dealings with others.
My book actually contains a strong message of tolerance, too, based upon my experience with autism.
That said, I am not convinced that we should suffer abuse at the hands of nasty customers just to win business. The fellow with a stroke is one case. The kid with an attitude that comes in tanked up and looking for an argument is entirely another.
We all have to decide how much to tolerate in a given situation, and for me, if there's no liklihood of feeling good about the transaction after, why do it?
Hi John,
Well put. I think such a situation would be at the extreme end of the range. The best way to handle that would be to ask them to leave. I believe you might agree that sort of thing is very rare. I don't believe this has ever happened to me.
My experience has been the vast majority of folks are not that way. Some may disagree with us and even say something out of place. I would wish to build my system around this large majority. As in anything there will be the rare exception. Between the extremes, I believe a lot has to do with the way I view the situation? This is where I hope to do better.
Joined: 15 May 2007 Posts: 774 Location: Baton Rouge, LA
Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 9:39 pm Post subject:
johnrobison wrote:
Louis, I have always thought you are an insightful, thoughtful, and spiritual fellow. I think we sometimes have to separate what's good for US from what's good for OUR COMPANIES and recognize that they will not always be the same.
Those of us who are employees must try and keep the interests of the company first if we are to keep our jobs. Those of us who are owners have more flexibility.
You know, I don't fire many customers, myself. But I do decline more work, when I don't feel the outcome will make me feel good.
I do not feel that every person who comes to a business for service will be a potential client at that time. Tomorrow morning my phone will start ringing at 7:00 AM. Some folks will have to have something done this week, and I will not be able to accommodate them. They are not a potential client for me at this time.
The same may be somewhat like the situation you are speaking about. When a business cannot meet [exceed] a clients specifications, it would be unwise for them to enter the transaction, in my opinion.
For me this must be based on what I see as a fact. For instance, the client needs it now and I can't do it now. My emotions have proven to me very unreliable and that is the point I hoped to make in my post. Sometimes people who start out a bit rough, turn out to be a great client.
There might also be those at the extreme end of the spectrum. I believe these are the ones you are speaking of. I think this might best be handled on a per occurrence basis.
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